Janathon Day 20 – Facing a Fear

Being that I have a diagnosed General Anxiety Disorder to say I have fears is an understatement – I have way too many to count!!! It’s exhausting I can tell you.

Due to Janathon, and being bitten by the exercise bug with my running, boxercise class and I have even bought weights, I got into my head to face one of those fears and that would be swimming!

My friend who is a swimming teacher kindly said she’d go with me and help me.

I was so nervous, you see I am ok in the water as long as I can touch the bottom.  Having watched my two children flourish at their swimming lessons, and we made sure that they were deep water lessons, I thought I needed to be as brave as my children – which is what I am trying to do!

It was tough, my stomach was in knots the night before.  I am not sure you can truly understand the affect of anxiety unless you are a sufferer – but my anxiety levels were very high, but I was excited too.  My dream is to be able to swim lengths is something I would love to crack in 2016.

My friend was very patient and encouraging, she even managed to persuade me to the deep end, which did take lots of deep breaths and trying to find an inner strength – whilst I clung to the edge like a limpet.  Eventually getting me to let go and touch the bottom with my feet and come back up and also do a star float on my front for a few seconds, still not quite brave enough to try and float on my back.

Really working on my breaststroke – need to improve my technique, trying to alternate arm strokes and kicking my legs, whilst also working out my breathing.  I can swim 15 metres and then it’s at that point I can no longer touch the bottom and panic sets in, I tense every muscle in my body (I seriously ache this evening)! It’s really tough, but I have taken the first steps and I feel rather proud even if I do say so myself.

The fact I managed to get myself running, which when I first started I could barely run for a minute after which it felt like I couldn’t catch my breath and now I regularly run 5 to 6km makes me realise that with perseverance and practice I can do this…

Thank you Janathon for getting me doing this and my wonderful friend putting up with me and my nervous energy! Hopefully I’ll carry on and succeed and one day feel confident in the water, all being well going back next week! 🙂 xxx

Shocking selfie because I felt an idiot taking a photo of myself at the swimming baths!
Shocking selfie because I felt an idiot taking a photo of myself at the swimming baths!

 

Sooooo tired

Specific exercise for Juneathon Day 20 was  20 toe touches, 20 sit and reaches, 20 sit ups/tummy crunches!

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In the role of auntie/mummy I want over to my sister’s for a celebratory mass marking my niece’s first holy communion which started at 10am – so a lovely early start for a Saturday morning.
Then to my niece’s school, where they had a party – I stared longingly at the cupcakes (stupid IBS – with it’s wheat/dairy intolerances).
Then back to my sister’s – where I helped her for a bit, kneaded some modelling chocolate icing.
After which I drove home – ate some lunch – gathered some bits as the Pink One had a party to attend, and they were currently round nanny and granddad D’s with their daddy.  So I headed to nanny and granddad D’s house.
From there, we went to the kid’s auntie’s house, where, with the help of nanny and granddad D, released some fish into the pond.
This point I took the Pink One, and we stopped off on the high street – went to the Card Factory (no prizes for guessing why!) and then a quick visit to the dance shop where I got the Pink One her very first leotard for gymnastics – she was thrilled!
Back into the car and drive to the party the Pink One was attending at a local soft play.  When that finished, I decided to drive over to my mum and dad’s, nanny and granddad P’s so we could drop off his Father’s Day Card.  The Pink One thought this was great, and modelled her new leotards for them.
Then a drive back to nanny and granddad D’s to collect the Hubby and the Blue One, and have some dinner.  Finally home where the Blue One sat in his new big boy car seat for the ride home for the first time!!!

Car seat king!
Car seat king!

I am completely exhausted, so now it’s time to take my tired body to bed!!!

Could just about see straight to write this…
Good night all!!!

🙂 xxx

To run or not run…

So this morning I thought for my Janathon Day 20 I’d go for a run in the evening when my husband got in from work but as the day wore on and it got darker and colder and I got more tired my conviction to go diminished to the point where when my husband did get in from work I pretty much wasn’t going and thought I’ll just do some activity on the Wii!

 

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My hubby kindly just said “Go for a run!” – which is the best thing he could’ve done because I did! It wasn’t long but it was nice and refreshing! I’m glad I went! It feels good!

😊️xxx